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Mike A. Tiger’s Weekly Game Blog: South Carolina

LSU Fighting Tigers vs. South Carolina

Well, this week you get a very contrite Mike A. Tiger, who personally witnessed a good ole fashioned butt whuppin’ and endured the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune from the locals after the game. As the rest of you, I at least expected a close game at Florida. But when the first pass of the game was set up volleyball style for Percy Harvin to cradle and dart into the sandbox I knew it was not going to be our night. Here’s a photo they took of me in the third quarter:

All fun and smack talk aside, you have to tip your hat to another elite SEC team. NOBODY was going to beat the Gators last Saturday night in the reptile pit. Not Texas, OU, USC, Penn State, you name ‘em. I’ve seen my Tigers come out of the tunnel en fuego like that too.

My fondest hope now is that Florida continues to beat up the East and we take care of business so there can be a rematch on a neutral field in Atlanta with everything on the line. Onward Tigers!

So this week let’s make it a true road trip and take in some sights. South Carolina offers some unique and interesting diversions for traveling Tigers. I’ve heard many are taking an extra couple of days off to see Charleston and play a round or two at Hilton Head or Myrtle Beach. There’s Fort Sumter and other historical destinations. But if you have the time, ole Mikey has a couple of suggestions off the beaten path:

UFO Welcome Center- Bowman
If you were thinking that the aliens would make contact by landing at the White House or in Roswell, New Mexico, think again. ET is coming home to Bowman, South Carolina, which is between Charleston and Columbia, less than an hour from the stadium.

The UFO Welcome Center consists of a large flying saucer built by one Jody Pendarvis in the yard beside his trailer. It is covered with wood and plastic and fiberglass and painted a uniform silver and festooned with Christmas tree lights. The craft is mounted on four 6 x 6 columns and designed to raise and lower with electric motors. It has a functional hydraulic entry ramp. Inside could easily be an alien’s tailgating palace…with a TV and satellite dish, video monitor to see what the terrestrials are doing outside, air conditioner, bed, and toilet. Jody says the shower-I mean the decontamination chamber- is awaiting installation.

You can view this from the road, but if you want a personal guided tour you will have to call Jody in advance. He charges $3 per human admission. (803) 829-2311. Address is 4004 Homestead Road, Bowman, SC. (corner of Elm Street and Oliver Street, one block northwest of U.S. 178.)

Atomic Bomb Crater – Mars Bluff
Seeing a pattern here? In 1958 an unarmed A bomb was dropped at a place called Mars Bluff near Florence. An investor bought the land and put a large trailer park next to the crater. I guess that is where the aliens will settle down when they get here. The locals will know how to direct you to see the crater, but for a buck admission you can see bomb fragments on display at the Florence Museum of Art, Science and History. (843)662-3351

Large Rotating Cow - Charleston
For my Atlanta readers you will appreciate Charleston’s version of “The Big Chicken.” This large "rotating" bovine is the mascot of the Coburg Dairy and has been walking in circles for several years on Hwy 17 South, in the St. Andrews shopping center. This icon has endured all manner of “attention” by the locals over the years.

For Tiger fans in Columbia who cannot venture very far, you still have the South Carolina State Fair, which will be within spitting distance of the stadium this weekend. For the first time ever, the area around an LSU game will actually smell like corndogs. Show your game ticket for free admission on Saturday. Mikey plans to walk the Midway and count teeth to pass the time. And don’t miss taking a gander at the unique “Cockabooses that the elite fans use as luxury suites outside of Williams Brice Stadium.

Talk about cool!

So let’s end the travelogue and talk about football. It’s hard to get all geeked up about SEC latecomer South Carolina. Their Gamecock mascot- affectionately referred by fans as “an ass kickin’ chicken”- doesn’t exactly strike fear into the heart of tigers.

Neither does their football program, even with one of college football’s greatest coaches steering their fortunes. But if there is a date on LSU’s schedule that says “trap game” this is it. And coming off a hard-fought victory last week, Cocky’s crew will be sky high to throw another brick on LSU’s teetered wagon.

Why the “other” USC has not seen a lot more football success is somewhat of a mystery to Mikey. If Clemson can recruit and field competitive teams and even win a National Championship, you would think the state flagship school nestled in its capital would have the dominant history. The bigger mystery is how Steve Spurrier has not been able to recruit a prototype Evil Empire quarterback that can execute the devious plays that endlessly dance under that visor.

If I was a top prospect on the Atlantic southeast I would listen very closely to the Spurrier pitch in my living room. Perhaps the reputation that Steve doesn’t like recruiting is true and he is playing too much golf as he coasts to retirement. But it’s hard to believe the fire is gone from his belly and he is never to be underestimated. The Gamecocks will always win a couple they aren’t expected to under Darth Visor, but just getting to a bowl is a huge accomplishment.

Spurrier simply doesn’t have the horses…I mean fighting fowl…to claw to the top of the SEC East. And we can expect that Les Miles and the LSU Fighting Tigers have used the Gator beatdown as a wake-up call and will cut out the trash talk and let it show on the field.

Prediction:
The angry tiger will feast on game hens this Saturday. Our weaknesses (inexperienced developing QB and defensive secondary) were exposed by the mud lizards. But the real reason was that our highly-vaunted linemen ran their mouths too much and were not focused and ready to play in a tough match. This week, they will find the zone and start proving they deserve to be considered among the best. Lee will find more time to run our offense and Carolina will be scrambling to find yardage as the game progresses.

The talent differential will be the tell of the tape this week. And an angry Hurricane Mike that fizzled last week will finally make landfall in Columbia. After a few hard shots the Gamecocks will be talking in the huddle like Miss Teen South Carolina was in the Miss Teen USA pageant. Guess what? South Carolina holds the record for the most Miss Congeniality awards in pageant history. As nice as their fans and stadium are to visit, it looks like the Gamecocks have that to hold onto in football as well. LSU 35, Gamecocks 13.

So have a great road trip if you are going. And make sure to send home one of these spiffy postcards with a “wish you were here” note:

Your Pal,

Mike A. Tiger

LSU Faithful in the ATL: Please join us at one of our two view-in locations to watch Tiger Football this fall= Rio Grande Cantina in Buckhead or Buffalo Wild Wings in Alpharetta. We promise you won’t find a better viewing party with your fellow fans!

Also congrats to the LSU Tiger Band for winning the ESPN "Battle of the Bands" with that AWESOME Indiana Jones video!!